Baker Bear
@baker-bear.bsky.social
Pretty sure my roomie @faust.gay is familiar with their stuff. The name rings a bell for me.
Eggs: Yes
Steak: Medium rare
Milk: Anything but skim
Alcohol: Rum
Warm Drink: Tea
Eggs: Over Easy
Steak: Medium Rare, but Prime Rib!
Milk: 1%, I don't think I can do 2% anymore.
Alcohol: Rye
Warm Drink: Masala Chai
It's a weekend. That's the only thing that made sense to me with the visible letters.
Work email came in not long ago.
Every month, we have a happy hour following our staff meeting.
This month, someone in Tax is bringing in her Switch and we're going to play Let's Sing.
Competitive karaoke. This should be fun...
Date: May 16, 2024
Dish: Chocolate Rum Cake
Occasion: Coworker's birthday
Made a rum cake once before, didn't turn out so hot. This one went a lot better.
#baking #birthday #chocolate #rum #cake
Summer before my senior year of HS. Bobby and I had been friends since spring term of freshman year.
Me: Hey, Bobby.
Bobby: Hey.
Me: You mind if I come over?
Bobby: I don't care if you come over or not.
I hung up and never went to his place again. We haven't spoken since graduation 23 years ago.
Someone from the 226 area code just added me on WhatsApp. Who do I know from Ontario?
95 reasons why Earth should be obliterated was nailed to the Vogon High Council's door.
"Oh, bother. My dummy thicc dumptruck has extruded green plasticine dingus."
My mom did. Them and BMG. She's get the deal, ignore all their subsequent subscription ploys, then "you haven't ordered from us in a while, how about 15 more albums for a dollar or whatever".
Easily 2/3 of her CD collection was built this way.
If Chaz's SolelyFans account was filled with the content you'd expect.
"Hey, bruh, need some help up? If you wanted to see me in the shower, you coulda just asked."
Here we go! Five sketches of some horny, handsome boys. This REALLY got me through those weekend shifts.
Would def be down to do this again sometime <3
@ta-blackstone.bsky.social
@samsouthpaw.bsky.social
@markybuns.bsky.social
@rolfthewhatever.bsky.social
@baker-bear.bsky.social
Warning: This content contains explicit adult material and is only intended for individuals of legal age; viewer discretion is advised.
Today I turned 40. I went to a Russian market and got enough chocolate, zefir, and cherry vareniki to make my pancreas submit.
The only limits are those you set or your body sets for you.
The jock, the preppy kid, and the nerd who does the homework for them, which means he's protected.
Usually, but after some of the rain we had up here, the Cybertrucks I've seen look pretty low-rez.
It's only a few characters off from the glitch that sent Dexter Douglas into the Internet.
"I think we're gonna hafta kill this pre-vert, Max."
"Sorry, I was just disintegrating some malcontents. What'd you say, Rocket?"
"I *like* you."
I can hear my pot pies dripping in the oven.
The fluting I did on the crust was not the best.
TFW the angel and devil on your shoulders agree on what your next move should be.
Past: I wrote a 4,000-word sex scene today
Present: I'm baking two scratch-made chicken pot pies.
Future: I'm going to make some flaky biscuits to go along with them
Oh, lawdy, that takes me back to using tea tree oil shampoo for the first time. Yowza!
I was looking for a GIF of that.
Got a whole cast of fellas who are up for the task. What's your pleasure?
"Sure, I can pull you out of escrow...as long as you don't pull out of me for at least an hour..."
Oh, for sure. My temples are also giving up the ghost when it comes to color.
Just aware that one of these days, it's going to look like I faceplanted in powdered sugar and couldn't get it out of my hair. XD
Challenge for the willing: selfie right now.
God, my chin has gone gray...
Challenge for the willing: selfie right now
Daily dose of sunlight please end me
I'm all for sustainable processes in food, but this seems a bit much...
I was a math major in college. I remember a question in my group/ring theory textbook had a typo that no one else's had. It made the question impossible to solve.
Crazy what the omission of "not" can do.
The only remotely pleasant or approachable member of the Lymax family. He's all about them gains and hugging away your pains.
He talks like Crush from "Finding Nemo", but pitched down a little.