Harbinger Of Head

What if there was a button you could click but if you clicked it you would get extreme satisfaction of clicking a button with many future opportunities to push said button again. Would you click that button?

You used to be able to tell when a guy was a dad in a tv show because he had a pipe but now anarchy reigns

Snorting powdered milk with a little cardboard sign that says fentanyl in front of a police station to begin psyop and legend

nice 😎

I'd have the fattest ass, the perkiest tits, and the juiciest pussy in Whoville I can tell you that much right now buster

I love cracking my neck like it's a cold one

I have to sign an NDA and I feel like a true american

I wish drinking diet coke made my cum taste like diet coke but pineapples robbed of us of that joy

woag it's u

I wish I was in the Addams family because they have generational wealth and a goth milf

If liberals kill babies can they start with me

Look dust or no dust a bowl is a bowl and FDR should have been smoking that shit

I've been friends with this cishet couple for years and I finally worked up the courage to ask if they have ever had sex

I am done pacing back and forth from here on out it's just forth with me

If I was the Devil I'd kill santa for all that mail of his I'd keep getting

My biggest kink has to be like hugging or something like that hmu if you're a freak like me 😈

Good thing James Bond's first name isn't Bing. He has that going for him at least poor british bastard.

My tummy for a hort

God is real and he told me it was my turn to use the xbox

Bumper sticker that says "I swerve for cops"

Don't know why we call them ring lights they take pictures of other things just fine

If you are bumping your mattress you are having sex with your shadow. Think before you act.

opossum! where?

Just learned that anger and sadness are two separate emotions and I can honestly say I don't know how to feel about that

Crying while being angry only makes me more angry because I'm like "This is not what that dang flash card showed for anger I am letting that flash card and everyone else down"

As far as evolution goes the one thing I'm really missing is the ability to turn my pupils into little hearts before I bite someone

I like having people over and then showing them one at a time each of my favorite things

My boyfriend forgot to fill my food dish so I am going to spend the whole day slowly knocking glasses and the such off of high surfaces might fuck around with the houseplants too if I get time after throwing up all over his pillow

I would have shot E.T his ass is not from my god's green earth

At a certain part of your 20s you start using 3% of your brain to think about soup and I think that's beautiful

Y'all ever frot feet

It should have been who got all that attention not Sharon Tate

ayy lmao

What if and I know this is a stretch but I choked myself out on your dick like what if

We can fuck if we want to
We can fuck your friend's behind
'Cause your friends don't fuck
And if they don't fuck
Well that's okay because it's all about consent

I start my new job on monday and my consumerism brain has been activated I need 1,000 plushies

If I could have a room for cute pink things and then like the office of a man who authorized throwing hot coals from the train onto the workers of pipelines in the 1890s that would really suit me

"I'm baby" broke
"am baby" woke

I need lot's of cute things or a lot things found in a corporate headquarters in 1965 it's a duality

is that an invitation?

i miss u

Catgirls are so back

hehehe hi

sometimes to feel connected with the common man and lose myself in the common identity of society I wear and red polo and khakis to target

*borat voice* my butt

I could be "healthier" but like who has the time when you have to focus so much on being horny

A sauna just for girls to get explore sweat together

maybe i do and maybe i do