Johnny Dangerously

Bit offended by that actually.

I thought I had an open invite.

Okay.

I bet you have great gutters and you’ve still got a half hour to get your entry in.

I can’t. I’ve tried, believe me, I’ve tried.

I have stamina.

It’s been a long weekend and I have to be up early tomorrow,so I’ll say good night now, so you can say it back, and I can then wish you a good night too, despite having already done it, and still be in bed by midnight.

Okay.

I’ll put you down as a ‘probably’

Okay, I’ll use you once.

Vous speakè encrodeeble Fronglaze.

Well, I was gonna see if I could exchange, but I’ll just bin you straight to recycling.

Ou est le cheveux?

I hope you’re from Marks and Sparks.

Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?

Rebloot with your Sunday mood.

Fade @fade.bsky.social

reskeet with your Sunday mood

2 hours ago

FUCKING GRASS!

No. Not at all. What a ridiculous suggestion.

Anyway, gotta a dash.

Oh, before I do, can you put the toilet seat down. It’s really ruining my experience

Yup! That was her. I have a thing for Americans

Mmmmm

Schuladame Cheese GIF

ALT: Schuladame Cheese GIF

media.tenor.com

It’s better than nothing.

Slightly

Who’s that? His face rings a bell.

SHIT! I think I stole that guy’s wife.

I don’t believe I’ve ever invented any words. You’re gonna have to be more specific.

Fine!

What ‘b’ word?

How? Do you wanna see the contract I rejected, offering me the part of Thor before that Hemsworth dweeb?

I think he is. Have you seen his face?

Enculer vous

You don’t have to sleep with someone to find them sexy. I mean, I find loads of women sexy and there has to be at least 20-25 that I haven’t slept with yet.

Like sexiest man in the world Hollywood. Fuck, I didn’t even beat Jeremy Clarkson over here.

No, Doc Hollywood.

I think.

I dunno?

Was he sexy?

That involves logging on, waiting and then getting up to go to the door.

Do you not even have a block of cheese, Doc?

I don’t think you guys appreciate just how sexy I really am. I mean, I could be actual Hollywood.

Okay. It looks like it’s quiet here this evening, so I can post the below without drawing too much attention.

I’m not looking for sympathy or likes, but it’s something that’s being weighing me down for a while, so just putting it out there may help to alleviate the burden.

JUST BLOOT IN MY EAR ALREADY.

Go, on. You know you want to. Just whisper it. I won’t tell anyone b

I’m feeling awesome and can’t wait to get to work tomorrow.

S’up, Doc?

T walks out of the bar. Johnny says, “Why the long face?”